Changing the changeable

How do you typically respond when your girlfriend doesn’t change something you find unbelievably annoying? If you’re like many, you give up and convince yourself that “people can’t change”. Afterall, how else can we console ourselves when we are unsuccessful at altering our GF’s ways? To claim that WE failed simply won’t do… so we blame the person for not “wanting” to change. This may help you sleep at night, but it does little to change your irritating GF.

The fact is, people change all the time. You can’t tell me that becoming a parent doesn’t change the way you behave, at least around the kids (read: no more hair of the dog after a night out with friends). And it’s likely people’s behavior looks different at work than it does at home (think potty ettiquette).

The problem with saying your GF can’t change is that it’s a cop out. With a little more effort to uncover the root cause of the problem, you can focus on changing the changeable. Attack a SPECIFIC behavior vs. someone’s entire personality and you will have much more success.